Court! and gardening. Because those two things go together so well.
Well yesterday I finally got some seedlings planted. C helped me a little bit. It was an exercise in patience for me, and an exercise in sheer confusion for him. I don't think he understood exactly what we were doing but in a few weeks when they sprout I will show him...and maybe it will make sense then! Or maybe not. :) I am super excited for spring. Some of my tulips are beginning to make an appearance. It's nice to look out the window and see some tiny little bits of green in the grey and brown landscape.
Also we got our new fridge. It is 26 cubic feet, and our old one was 18 cubic feet. I am pretty darn excited about it! :) It is a dominating presence in our postage-stamp-sized kitchen but hopefully now we will not have food overflowing out of the fridge every time we go to the grocery store. It is a bottom freezer one too, so I'm hoping having the fridge part more on eye-level will result in less food waste.
Now the part you have all been waiting for - court!
Everybody was there except for D's dad, who never shows up to anything so that is nothing new. There was a question and answer time (deposition? I don't really know what it would be called). It was pretty easy going, no one asked any really difficult questions (like "Why did you miss 20+ visits in the past 2.5 months?) or anything like that.
Basically the big take-away was a) that the SC looked very unprepared and also contradicted himself and b) that bio dad is going to be starting visits if/when he begins submitting to drug tests.
For those of you that might not have been reading for a while, the youngest three children (C, Y, and baby M) have the same dad. D's dad is some other guy. Bio dad had visits with the two boys for a while, I believe he had about 3 visits with them back in August before M was born. Then he just quit showing up to visits. When M was born he had a brief visit with all three of the kids at the hospital, but since then there has been nothing at all. One of the last things he wrote in our notebook, when I told him about how C was so excited to be getting to see his dad, was "I guess C is back to wanting to see me all the time!" and then he quit showing up.
When they would have visits C was basically just falling apart - he wanted to see his dad more than he got to, and...it was just a hard time for everyone. And then for him to just stop showing up...well I don't have to tell you how frustrating it is for me to have to watch this man's son go through all of these emotions and be so young to not understand what is going on.
To say that I have some issues with this man is a serious understatement.
I was almost in tears in the court room when they were talking about it. Dad is supposed to start some treatment at some point but not really sure when.
I also know that the judge did not read my Caregiver Information reports prior to making his findings, which I feel is unfortunate. Not that it would have changed anything but maybe it would have given him a better idea of what is going on with the kids.
There was supposed to be a Permanency Hearing today as well, but apparently there are special forms that somebody (I assume HHS or the SC) is supposed to fill out...and it didn't get done, so that hearing was continued to June 9. June 9 will mark 15 months that the kids have been in foster care, and the state can terminate parental rights at that time. CAN being the important word there. Will they? I doubt it. Maybe for D's dad, or maybe for bio dad. Maybe. But probably not, because they are making "progress"! We'll see what happens, though.
Baby M was at court, and bio mom held her the whole time. Bio mom looked pretty miserable when she had to give M back. It is sad but at the same time, her own decisions have caused her to not be able to be with her children.
In other tantrum-related news, C cried/screamed so much on Sunday that he made himself hoarse. I took Y and D to church for first service, and DH came by himself to second service so we could tag-team C at home and both still get to church. That kid, man I don't know what his deal is. I am pretty excited about taking him to the doctor but I really hope the doctor takes me seriously and does not write this behavior off as typical for a 2-year-old. Yesterday wasn't too bad and today I don't think has been totally awful, but DH stayed with him while I went to court so I haven't been around him a whole lot today.
And now off to clean the kitchen some more!
Also we got our new fridge. It is 26 cubic feet, and our old one was 18 cubic feet. I am pretty darn excited about it! :) It is a dominating presence in our postage-stamp-sized kitchen but hopefully now we will not have food overflowing out of the fridge every time we go to the grocery store. It is a bottom freezer one too, so I'm hoping having the fridge part more on eye-level will result in less food waste.
Now the part you have all been waiting for - court!
Everybody was there except for D's dad, who never shows up to anything so that is nothing new. There was a question and answer time (deposition? I don't really know what it would be called). It was pretty easy going, no one asked any really difficult questions (like "Why did you miss 20+ visits in the past 2.5 months?) or anything like that.
Basically the big take-away was a) that the SC looked very unprepared and also contradicted himself and b) that bio dad is going to be starting visits if/when he begins submitting to drug tests.
For those of you that might not have been reading for a while, the youngest three children (C, Y, and baby M) have the same dad. D's dad is some other guy. Bio dad had visits with the two boys for a while, I believe he had about 3 visits with them back in August before M was born. Then he just quit showing up to visits. When M was born he had a brief visit with all three of the kids at the hospital, but since then there has been nothing at all. One of the last things he wrote in our notebook, when I told him about how C was so excited to be getting to see his dad, was "I guess C is back to wanting to see me all the time!" and then he quit showing up.
When they would have visits C was basically just falling apart - he wanted to see his dad more than he got to, and...it was just a hard time for everyone. And then for him to just stop showing up...well I don't have to tell you how frustrating it is for me to have to watch this man's son go through all of these emotions and be so young to not understand what is going on.
To say that I have some issues with this man is a serious understatement.
I was almost in tears in the court room when they were talking about it. Dad is supposed to start some treatment at some point but not really sure when.
I also know that the judge did not read my Caregiver Information reports prior to making his findings, which I feel is unfortunate. Not that it would have changed anything but maybe it would have given him a better idea of what is going on with the kids.
There was supposed to be a Permanency Hearing today as well, but apparently there are special forms that somebody (I assume HHS or the SC) is supposed to fill out...and it didn't get done, so that hearing was continued to June 9. June 9 will mark 15 months that the kids have been in foster care, and the state can terminate parental rights at that time. CAN being the important word there. Will they? I doubt it. Maybe for D's dad, or maybe for bio dad. Maybe. But probably not, because they are making "progress"! We'll see what happens, though.
Baby M was at court, and bio mom held her the whole time. Bio mom looked pretty miserable when she had to give M back. It is sad but at the same time, her own decisions have caused her to not be able to be with her children.
In other tantrum-related news, C cried/screamed so much on Sunday that he made himself hoarse. I took Y and D to church for first service, and DH came by himself to second service so we could tag-team C at home and both still get to church. That kid, man I don't know what his deal is. I am pretty excited about taking him to the doctor but I really hope the doctor takes me seriously and does not write this behavior off as typical for a 2-year-old. Yesterday wasn't too bad and today I don't think has been totally awful, but DH stayed with him while I went to court so I haven't been around him a whole lot today.
And now off to clean the kitchen some more!
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