Bio Dad

He's making an appearance again.

The state in their infinite wisdom have decided that the best thing to do is to put this "dad" (who has not seen his children in almost 7 months) on a visit with a 3 year old, a 23 month old, and a 7 month old, all at the same time, DURING NAP TIME. Doesn't that sound like the most pleasant experience you can possibly think of? Apparently there is just no other time to do it other than during nap time. Personally I find that a little hard to believe.

I have written several complaint emails but everybody just pretty much tells me too bad, so sad.

The bonus for me (but the bad thing for bio mom!) is that straight after the visit with dad the kids will be coming to her for four hours! So they are going to be a) not napped, b) probably confused about having spent time with a stranger/their dad that they vaguely remember, c) extremely tired/fussy/crabby/etc.

The GAL is not standing up for these kids on this and it pisses me off.

Maybe I am over-reacting but honestly if they were coming back here after the visit with their dad I would be super mad. They, especially Y, are holy terrors when they do not get their naps. And any of you with small children probably know that after the nap schedule gets messed up, night time sleep is affected; and it can sometimes take a day or two for the kids to get back to normal. And it's not like they can just lay down at 3:30 after the visit is over and take a nap - they would sleep for two hours then be up until midnight!

I just find it really hard to believe that out of all of the time in the world, including 4 entire days each week when the kids have no visits to work around and are free all day except for between the hours of 12-3 or so, they cannot find 2 hours where bio dad can have a visit.

I love how this system always puts the children first!!!! :(


  1. i know what a big deal it is, and this is a very bad plan :/

  2. Unbelievable! I know this isn't true - but just looking at this situation at face value one could make the case that no one but you and DH really care about the KIDS. This is just silly - no - stupid really. Wonder how long bio-sperm donor will be in the picture this time. Come on - we can't really call him dad can we? :/ is right.

  3. First off - new to your blog from Blog Frog.

    Secondly - child protective services, Department of health and such always seem to frustrate me. I admire you for being a foster parent and hope one day to be one myself...but I REALLY admire your strength in dealing with the "powers that be". I know they ultimately want good for the kids, but sometimes, I wonder if they have taken their heads out of their butts long enough to think through things (like this situation) thoroughly or are they just doing what is convenient.

    Sorry you have to deal with this.


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