And...it's rant time
I don't know what to do.
So...D is mad at me. First, he is mad because I gave a pacifier to Y today. Please note that this was after Y had spent almost 4 hours in the car, he is sick, he has barely got to have any run around/play time, and D yells at Y when he cries (don't ask me why, it makes no sense to me). I don't want to listen to Y cry for the 30 minute car ride home, and I especially don't want to listen to D yell at Y, on top of Y's crying. When I'm driving I can do nothing about the crying at all. So pacifier it is. I am not a person that believes in letting a baby have it like baby crack or something like that but I think, hey, the kid is having a really hard day, so why not! But D almost started CRYING about it. Really. He was mad. He says that Y is not a baby anymore and he doesn't need it and his mom wouldn't let him have it. Well...I am not your mom.
Then we went out to dinner, and I brought food for Y (peaches, chicken nuggets, cheerios, plus my husband gave him some bread with butter on it which he really loved). D was like "You know he can eat real food, right?" And my husband and I were both kind of like..uh, what do you think he's eating? Fake food? And D asked us "Well let me ask you...can he have a french fry?" And my response was "Well...sure, he CAN, but I would rather that he not". And I went on to explain that Y cannot fit that much food in his little belly, so the food he DOES eat needs to be really good for him so he gets all the nutrients he needs so he can get bigger. D was still mad though. Whether he likes it or not, Y is a baby. What do you call a human that can't walk, and can't talk, and can't take care of himself for the most part? Yeah I'm sure he is technically a toddler now. But still! And honestly I don't care if he has one stinking french fry. But I'm not going to offer him a giant plate of french fries for his whole dinner. The old foster mom told me that D used to try to give Y things like Totinos Pizza Rolls. That's not going to happen at our house for a while.
I don't want to go against D or the kids' mom. But I do want to do the best I can for these kids, which includes choosing what they (especially the little one) eat, and the decision to give or not to give pacifiers when they are at my house. I don't know if D has noticed but I also do his meal planning and grocery shopping and choose what he eats for dinner! I might be being a little bit over protective of this little one's diet, and maybe I will loosen up over time. Maybe. :)
End rant.
Let me tell you why Y had to spend so much time in the car today. First we take D to and from his sports camp, which is 30 minutes away. So that means one hour each way, so that's two hours right there. Then he went to visit his mom, which means he spends about an hour going to and from there. Then we also went to see his pediatrician, which just happens to be on the exact opposite side of town from where we live...which is another 30 minutes each way (I just went to the one he had been seeing because I wanted to get him in ASAP). I felt so, so bad for the little guy! :( He did awesome though. He was cracking everyone up at the restaurant, looking around at all the people and smiling and clapping and just being a big goof ball. Tomorrow we will only be going to the grocery store I think, so we will get to have a fun filled day at home with hardly any car time.
He got weighed at the doctor's office and their scale said he was like 18.125 lbs? According to the calculators online he is in the less than 5th percentile for weight. That is very small. Also he apparently has an upper respiratory infection, so we got a couple of antibiotics to give him. He took them like a champ so they must taste good! I called the FSW to let her know what the doctor said and that we were starting him on meds, and she said "Oh, I'm glad you took him in. He's had those symptoms for quite a while now." Poor dude! Irritating to say the least. Can't believe no one took him in earlier. I started calling him "snot factory". It was really bad.
So...D is mad at me. First, he is mad because I gave a pacifier to Y today. Please note that this was after Y had spent almost 4 hours in the car, he is sick, he has barely got to have any run around/play time, and D yells at Y when he cries (don't ask me why, it makes no sense to me). I don't want to listen to Y cry for the 30 minute car ride home, and I especially don't want to listen to D yell at Y, on top of Y's crying. When I'm driving I can do nothing about the crying at all. So pacifier it is. I am not a person that believes in letting a baby have it like baby crack or something like that but I think, hey, the kid is having a really hard day, so why not! But D almost started CRYING about it. Really. He was mad. He says that Y is not a baby anymore and he doesn't need it and his mom wouldn't let him have it. Well...I am not your mom.
Then we went out to dinner, and I brought food for Y (peaches, chicken nuggets, cheerios, plus my husband gave him some bread with butter on it which he really loved). D was like "You know he can eat real food, right?" And my husband and I were both kind of like..uh, what do you think he's eating? Fake food? And D asked us "Well let me ask you...can he have a french fry?" And my response was "Well...sure, he CAN, but I would rather that he not". And I went on to explain that Y cannot fit that much food in his little belly, so the food he DOES eat needs to be really good for him so he gets all the nutrients he needs so he can get bigger. D was still mad though. Whether he likes it or not, Y is a baby. What do you call a human that can't walk, and can't talk, and can't take care of himself for the most part? Yeah I'm sure he is technically a toddler now. But still! And honestly I don't care if he has one stinking french fry. But I'm not going to offer him a giant plate of french fries for his whole dinner. The old foster mom told me that D used to try to give Y things like Totinos Pizza Rolls. That's not going to happen at our house for a while.
I don't want to go against D or the kids' mom. But I do want to do the best I can for these kids, which includes choosing what they (especially the little one) eat, and the decision to give or not to give pacifiers when they are at my house. I don't know if D has noticed but I also do his meal planning and grocery shopping and choose what he eats for dinner! I might be being a little bit over protective of this little one's diet, and maybe I will loosen up over time. Maybe. :)
End rant.
Let me tell you why Y had to spend so much time in the car today. First we take D to and from his sports camp, which is 30 minutes away. So that means one hour each way, so that's two hours right there. Then he went to visit his mom, which means he spends about an hour going to and from there. Then we also went to see his pediatrician, which just happens to be on the exact opposite side of town from where we live...which is another 30 minutes each way (I just went to the one he had been seeing because I wanted to get him in ASAP). I felt so, so bad for the little guy! :( He did awesome though. He was cracking everyone up at the restaurant, looking around at all the people and smiling and clapping and just being a big goof ball. Tomorrow we will only be going to the grocery store I think, so we will get to have a fun filled day at home with hardly any car time.
He got weighed at the doctor's office and their scale said he was like 18.125 lbs? According to the calculators online he is in the less than 5th percentile for weight. That is very small. Also he apparently has an upper respiratory infection, so we got a couple of antibiotics to give him. He took them like a champ so they must taste good! I called the FSW to let her know what the doctor said and that we were starting him on meds, and she said "Oh, I'm glad you took him in. He's had those symptoms for quite a while now." Poor dude! Irritating to say the least. Can't believe no one took him in earlier. I started calling him "snot factory". It was really bad.
What a good mommy you are to these boys! D may not appreciate it now - but one day he'll look back and see what good care you provided for them. I LOVE reading your blog Brynnie! I know it's time consuming - but I hope you can keep posting at least once in awhile. Love you B
ReplyDeleteWhat stinks about D is that he thinks/hopes he'll be back living with his mom before the new school year starts, but from what we're hearing from the FSW and the case worker, he'll be fortunate to be back with her by the time NEXT year's school year starts :( So he's already setting himself up for frustration but we're not sure what we can tell him because we don't want to rain on his parade but at the same time don't want him to develop an unrealistic expectation of his timetable with us.
ReplyDeleteHello friend. Hang in there. You are doing a great job! Praying for you tonight!
ReplyDeletesounds like you are doing a great job Brynn! I'm sure I'll be calling you when we get some kids eventually
ReplyDelete