Crash course in parenting - Life as a foster mom

Saturday my niece came over while my brother, sister in law, and husband went to a football game. She was soooo cute. She is 10 months old and already able to walk a few steps unassisted. It was a lot of fun, until my brother got back and woke her up from her nap. He laid her on the floor to change her diaper, and she barfed all over the carpet. He picked her up and took her into the kitchen, and she barfed some more. OK, she barfed a LOT more. I would have never thought so much barf could come out of one baby! I am hoping that whatever caused that was not contagious, because I do not need to get sick and I for SURE don't need the boys to get sick! I can't even imagine. I have been so lucky so far that the only times they have thrown up have been a little bit, and never multiple times in a day. I am not sure how well I'd do with multiple little barfing children! D had his two overnight visits this weekend. It sounded like it went well. He was in a surprisingly good ...

As we were driving D to school yesterday, a fire truck drove right by us with sirens on and horn honking. Needless to say, the boys were beside themselves with excitement! C: Why is he honking his horn? Me: To tell people to get out of the way! C: So they won't get hurt? me: Yeah. Then I heard this gem come from the back seat: C: Ironman did not get out of the way for the firetruck and he got DEAD! __________________________ C: I'm a BAD T-REX! Y: Don't get me T-Rex! C: RAWR! (Chasing Y around the room) Then the boys collapse in giggles, and do it 100 more times. :) Sometimes it's a huge pain in the bum to have two kids so close in age, but watching them play together is so much fun (when they are being nice to each other, at least). ____________________________________ C: When we get home, I want to play outside! Me: We can't play outside because (caseworker lady) is coming over. C: I don't like (caseworker lady)! She is UGLY! I totally freaked out on him abou...

D came home from his Saturday visit looking, as my husband stated, "Like Dave Chappelle." He had on a wife beater, a "steel red" cap, and a big gaudy plastic rosary. Is his family Catholic? No. Are we Catholic? No. So why the rosary, you ask? I have no idea. I kind of feel like it's disrespectful to wear a symbolic religious item when you don't even know what it stands for or what it means, and when you honestly don't know anything about the religion itself. I talked to him about it a little bit, but only because he wanted to wear it to our (Christian) church on Sunday morning. I told him he can wear it on his own time but I would prefer if he didn't wear it to our church. He agreed to take it off which was good. I haven't seen it since. All I could really remember about the rosary was that it was used to pray to Mary...which, no offense to any of my Catholic readers (if I even have any), we don't really believe in at all. And I poin...

Welp, D and M both got granted additional overnight visits. So starting next week D will be gone on both Friday AND Saturday nights. I'm a little nervous about it, more from a behavior aspect than anything else. Right now he gets here and has a decent bedtime on Saturday night, sleeps in on Sunday morning and then is OK to go to school on Monday. If he has two late nights and early mornings in a row, Mondays might be kind of difficult for him! I guess D has been giving his bio mom a really hard time which stinks. Her life is already pretty difficult and he is making it harder than it needs to be, especially now when she is trying to do the right things to get her kids back. I don't really know how to support her or if she even wants support from us. I suggested that she read Love and Logic, but I don't know if she would be interested in doing that or not. The caseworker said she will wait on starting overnights for the two little boys because of their behaviors. C ...

A year and four months ago when the boys first moved in, I was given a set of bottles for Y. I was told to pass them on when I was done with them. Well, Y stopped using a bottle probably about a year ago, and they just sat in our basement. Finally 2 months ago I put them in the van, with the very good intention of donating them to the Crisis Pregnancy Center here in town. They continued collecting dust in the van until today. As I parked my car in front of the center, I saw a young girl walking in. When I walked in, she was sitting on the couch and filling out paperwork. It was all I could do to contain the tears that threatened to well up. I can't imagine the tragedy of an unexpected or unplanned pregnancy, especially when you are young and perhaps without supportive and loving people in your life, and without the financial and maybe even emotional resources to care for a child. My tragedy is the one where you hope and wish for a baby, but it doesn't happen. I feel so much...

Our little guys we are doing respite for...I'm going to call him "Spike" because of his awesome hairdo. He calls my husband Daddy. It is sweet but also kind of sad. I just feel like the words "mom" and "dad" should mean something, and not be assigned to a stranger you just met yesterday. I know Spike has visits with his real dad so he does have a dad in his life at least to some extent. My husband keeps telling Spike over and over "No, I'm not Daddy, I'm Brian!" and Spike will say "Hi Brian!" but then 2 seconds later calls him daddy again. Maybe his dad is the only real man in his life so he isn't sure what to make of my husband. Who knows. Spike is so polite. He always says thank you and you're welcome. And when you ask him to stop doing something he says "Sowwy!" He may or may not actually stop doing what you asked him to stop doing...but it's still pretty cute! I am pretty exhausted. Spike...

Well, we got an email Tuesday night asking us if we'd do respite for a little boy from Thursday to Sunday. He is 2 years old, and he has his TPR hearing on Friday and then his foster family is moving on Saturday. The kicker is that he doesn't go to daycare, so he would be home with me. Also he has no visits with his bio family for that time. So, of course we said yes. :) He came over today and he is ADORABLE. And, this child is busy. I mean, I don't think I ever saw him sit still except while he was eating or restrained in his car seat. He runs and climbs like a champ. He loves our dogs and cats, and when he doesn't see them where they are supposed to be (which is apparently wherever they were when he first saw them), he asks about them. And he gives them kisses which is totally awesome. I'm not sure on his exact age, but he has got to be pretty close to Y's age. When he got here I put him down for a nap (he had fallen asleep on the car ride over). We...

Well today I asked bio mom kindly to not send money home with the boys from visits, because I don't want them to swallow it in the car when no one is looking. I wanted to say PLEASE don't let them play with money, but I refrained because I really don't think she cares what I say. She responded that she never sends money home with them, she doesn't know how they always find money at her house. I am wondering if we are supposed to believe that C randomly found and swallowed a penny which just happened to show up on the bleachers of a small football stadium minutes after she arrived. Or does she think that them just finding money sounds better than her giving it to them? Because she has an almost-one-year-old that is mobile now, and the baby "finding money" could be bad news and it is pretty much a guarantee that if she finds it, it will go in the mouth! I don't think I mentioned yet that she has been granted overnight visits with the baby. The longest the...

Well bio mom told C to tell me "Can I go to D's football game tomorrow so I can see my mommy?" And he told me it. Kinda shady and manipulative on her part, IMHO, but whatever. Anyway, she showed up at the game and kind of treats it like a visit, which is fine, whatever. So she is in charge of the boys. She is always giving them money to play with, they bring it home and we have to take it away from them and then they cry. Well I went to go get my jacket out of the car, and when I got back, she told me "Um, C just swallowed a penny." At first I thought she was joking...I mean he's three, it seems like he would be too old for that but what do I know. But no, it was the truth. And this, bio mom, is why we don't let little children play with money. I am hoping it will come out in the next few days and be no big deal. But apparently pennies made after 1989 can react with acid in the stomach and create a substance as corrosive as battery acid, which soun...

At what point do 12-year-olds stop making you want to pull your hair out? I don't know if I am just too easily rattled or what, but all of the ungratefulness and rudeness just makes me want to never ever do anything nice for him again. There. Now that I got that off my chest, I guess I can move on with my life. UGGGHHHHHH.

I have been trying to keep a cleaner home lately. And the first person to notice was C! "Why is there nothing on the table?" and "Why is there no hair in the sink?" were a few of his innocent observations. Me = busted! :) I ran with the little boys in the stroller the other day. Together they weigh about 15 pounds more than they did last year, and let me tell you that I feel every one of those extra pounds in the stroller. I was pushing them and huffing and puffing, and C kept asking questions. So I very kindly asked him to quit talking to me while I was running. But then... Me: Oh great. C: Why say 'Oh great'? Me: Because there is a raccoon. (for real, it was right there, and it was the fattest raccoon you've ever seen, and I was with my dog and two little kids on a road with no sidewalk and no real way to avoid it) C: What is the raccoon doing? Me: It's just laying there. C: Why is it just laying there? Me: Because it's dead. C: Why is it ...

D came home with a do-rag on his head the other night. He looked like a little gangsta and I am NOT a fan of that look. Anyway, my husband told him "You look like a guy in a movie we just saw!" and I definitely did not say "Yeah, and he went to JAIL in case you were wondering!" I am a big fan of freedom of expression and all that jazz and I would never stereotype people based on what they wear. :) C lied to me this morning. Oh, how I HATE being lied to. I feel like it's just a slippery slope, it's a bad habit to be getting in to at the age of three. When you catch him in a lie he always says "No I don't wanna lie!" but then he won't admit that he lied. Anyway, I put him in time out and then went and talked to him. I tried to explain that God doesn't want us to lie, and in the Bible He tells us not to lie. C was very serious for a moment and then he said "And the Bible says we don't go in the kitchen!" That is a rul...