I'm stressed.

Y has been, how shall we say...difficult lately! Crying, oh man the crying. It is just whiny, crying all the time, crying in frustration when he can't do something like fit one object into another one or cover himself up with a blanket, crying when he needs to sleep but won't, crying from the SECOND he begins to stir in the morning or after nap, crying when he can't play with something the C monster is playing with...oh how it grates on my nerves. That's me being honest, right there! Man that kid has annoying cries! And it wouldn't be so bad if it weren't his go-to noise, I think. It's just that it is all the time!

But I love him anyway. :)

Kids start daycare on Monday. All three of them are going, for the minimum amount of time each week. The baby will still be with me when she is not at daycare and when her FM is at work, so I will have her for 2 or 3 hours a day.

C is finally scheduled for an eval with Early Childhood Development. The SC emailed me and said that she would be taking him to the appointment. I was, can I take him? Because I have some concerns and I'd like to talk with them about them. And she said that was OK. So over a 2 week period of time he is going to his ECD appointment, going to an orthopaedic surgeon for his feet, and going to a GI specialist so they can hopefully find the cause of his constant constipation. So much going on!

D's mom got a flier at his last football game for a club team that plays tackle football starting in August. Some of the games are in Omaha, 45 miles away. He will also be able to play football for his middle school, but I guess in middle school they only do flag football which I think is weird but whatever. Anyway we told D he could pick one or the other, and I also told bio mom about it and said maybe she and him could decide. If there is a possibility that he could be going home before or during the football season it would be much more difficult (I think) for her to get him to all of the games and practices for the club teams, whereas if he just played for the school then he would just stay after school for practice and most likely could ride a bus to the games. She said...drumroll please...that D could pick which he wanted to do! So I guess driving 45 miles one way for a football game every week or so is OK to do, but not to drive 5 miles to get to the doctor. Priorities, you know.

Anyway, I just have the feeling that these kids are going to be going home which makes me kinda sad but this is the point, right? Bio mom has been out of the place she was for over a week now, and no canceled visits so far which is good. If she can make it another week I think it will be her record for going the longest without canceling a visit. C is telling me pretty much every day that he doesn't like me. But he still wants me to hold him, and all that stuff. I think he thinks he should only like either me or his mom, and he picks his mom. Kind of like how he likes yogurt and cottage cheese, but sometimes he will say "I don't like cottage cheese; I like yogurt!" He will also say "I don't like you; I like my mom!" And he also asks about seeing his mom every day and of course he doesn't get to see her every day...I feel like he thinks that I am just being mean or something when I tell him he can't see her today, like I get to pick when he does or doesn't get to see his mom. I do try to explain that I don't get to pick when he sees his mom but I just wonder how much he understands.

Sounds like they are going to be splitting up the kids on visits so the mom can give more attention to each of the kids. D has said before that visits are boring because all his mom does is hold the baby. I can't even imagine having a baby and only getting to see her 12 hours a week. It's a sad deal all around but if they do end up going home probably the only one that will remember being in foster care is D. So I guess that's the bright side for them! I feel bad for him that he has to miss out on attention because he is self-sufficient and so much older than the other kids.

I think my first day of the kids being at daycare I am just going to take some time to decompress. Get some fancy coffee, get a book, and lay around on the couch and just take it easy. I need some time like that, I think. Then after that I have a list of things I want to accomplish each day

Anyway...I don't think Y is going back to sleep, so after talking to himself in his room until 10 p.m. last night, waking up early today because of D being loud, and then only sleeping for a little over an hour today for nap time, I have an afternoon/evening full of fun with a very whiny toddler ahead of me! You're jealous, admit it. :)


  1. oh, I'm very jealous ;)

    Wouldn't it be better for her to have them all at once to see if she can handle it? I mean, one-on-one time is great, but that's not reality...oh, well, I'm sure they have their reasons.
    on the whining, something that I picked up from my aunt (and helps with Samantha) is to whine back, mimicking their tone and pitch. At first Samantha would just stop and look at me like "WHAT is wrong with YOU?" and now she hates it- and stops!! My aunt went so far as to spend the WHOLE day talking in a whiny voice.
    It feels weird (and makes your throat hurt-I have no idea how they do it all day) but it seems to help...Even if they just think it's funny, as least they become aware of what they are doing!

  2. I have been doing that all day today. It seems to work so far! He still whines but he stops right away when I whine back. :) Thanks for the tip!

    I agree on the one-on-one time thing. I mean on the one hand if she had them in real life, the little ones would (hopefully) go to bed early and then she could have some alone time with D before he goes to bed, and the baby would nap in the morning while D is at school and she would get some alone time with the two little boys. But when they lived at home the little ones would stay up super duper late and sleep all day long, so...yeah. I don't know. I feel like there is going to be a big push from the kids' new GAL and from the new SC to get them home ASAP. We will see what happens I guess!


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