Crash course in parenting - Life as a foster mom

Well I know it's a day early. But I'm home alone right now so I have to take advantage of it! In October I set a goal of running 1,000 miles in 2011. Today, about 20 minutes ago, I completed that goal. Most miles run in a month: 138.8 (April) Most miles run in a week: 37 (week of May 2) Most miles run in a day: 26.2 (June 11, also set a new PR for the marathon) Now on to more important goals: Potty training C: Completed, with the added bonus of potty training Y as well! No more diapers for me except for when I am watching other people's kids. :) Being a better business owner/employee: Done, with the help of part-time daycare for the kids. Admitting I need help: Improvements made in 2011 Becoming more compassionate: Still working on, but hopefully moving in the right direction Losing 7 pounds: Not done. At all. But I haven't gained weight so that's gotta count for something! Getting up early to have quiet time before anybody else wakes up: Accomplished more often...

The boys had their first overnight visit with their mom since they have been in foster care which has been almost 21 months total. I wrote a page and a half on what to do for C's medicine, when to make sure he goes to the bathroom, some tips on making it happen without tantrums, how we put them to bed, etc. All she had to say about it in response was "We had a nice Christmas. Thanks for the picture." (we bought her this photo thing from Walmart.com, and it turned out kind of blurry which was frustrating, but it is still cute and has lots of pics of the kids on it) The boys seemed like they had fun but they were totally exhausted...they came home and napped for 2.5 hours, and then we decided we just needed to wake them up because who knows how long they might have slept! Last night C had a HUGE poop and told me "My butt hurts!" I asked if he had taken his medicine at his mom's...he said no. I asked if he had pooped at his mom's (he should have pooped ...

The little boys have been going to bed at around 7:00 pretty much since they moved in. I know, some of you parents out there are thinking WHAT THE HECK??? It's early, but I have to tell you - they have slept 11-12 hours per night the entire time they've lived with us, with few exceptions. Well now that Y is 2.5 and C is really almost 4 (FOUR YEARS OLD??!!!) I thought that maybe a little bit later bed time was in order. So for the past 2 nights we've put them to bed at 8:00. The end result? They still sleep 12 hours a night. Yeah, it's 8:18 a.m. and they are still asleep. So far, though, they seem less crabby in the morning so that's worth something. And it's nice to be able to stay out a little bit later or do things as a family in the evening. So I guess we'll keep this new bed time for a while and see how it turns out. The nice thing is that we should be able to get the boys in bed pretty reliably at 8:00 or 8:15, even on nights they have visits. So ...

I hate, hate, HATE visits that do not get cancelled until the kids arrive there. Needless to say, total meltdown going on right now. Each time this happens, sleep is the only cure. Hopefully it will come quickly for the C-Monster. ETA: I was just thinking about this. Her reason for missing the visit was a good one - but the kind of scary thing is that she is somewhere other than her home, with M and D, with no phone and the worker seemed to not know where she was. I find it odd that she can't take the two little boys when she already has the other two. As for the reason she is missing the visit, it is a good one. But there is no phone at all there that she could use to call us or anybody to let them know about this? It is just strange. Honestly I'd have paid the $2 or whatever it would be for her to call us collect! The boys ended up crying for about half an hour and are sleeping now, thank goodness. I laid with C in bed for a while and talked to him and he did finally s...

Just a quickie. My sister is home from Japan with my 9 month old niece whom I have NEVER met in real life. Though I think I was at least in close proximity to her when she was in utero. :) So we get to see them tonight and I am so excited! I guess I'm excited about seeing my brother-in-law too. ;) We had a team meeting on Wednesday and it was interesting as always. Sounds like all four of the kiddos are going to be spending the night with bio mom on Christmas Eve. It will be the first time that the little boys have slept there in about 20 months! After the new year, the little boys will start having one overnight visit a week and it will go from there. Also there is talk of D going home after the new year, followed by baby M shortly afterwards. So far the little boys still only have 4 hours as their longest visit, so I requested (for like the 4th time) that they be given one longer all-day visit before starting overnights...just makes sense to me, so they can get used to bei...

In our house, Baby Jesus is...a ping pong ball. Yes, that's right. And he lays in a manger which is a storage ottoman with the top removed and a blanket draped over it. And we have to be veeeery quiet when he is sleeping. And then when he starts crying... C: Oh no, he's crying! Me: Uh oh! What are you going to do? C: I'm gonna hold him, and wrap him up really good so he will be warm. (then he did that - soooo cute) Me: Oh, I think that is a great idea. C: I'm his Mommy! Me: Oh you are? C: Yeah and I will take care of him. Then a few minutes later... C: (holding a little dog toy that is a house) This is Baby Jesus's house and his Mommy is in there with him. Me: I thought you were Baby Jesus's Mommy? C: I'm not gonna be his mommy anymore. I'm gonna be a super hero! There you have it!

I hope I don't ruin this by explaining it too much! C was having a tantrum, and our time-out space is in the entry way of our home. There was a box sitting there with some brown paper in it. Our cat Alex adopted this box as her home for the time it was sitting there, and she pretty much was in the box unless she was eating or drinking. Alex is really weird, she is notorious for giving anybody and everybody the stink eye and just staring at you blankly if you are annoying her or not giving her what she wants. She is easily offended but is a pretty sweet cat. Anyway, C sometimes gets totally ridiculous in his tantrums and says off-the-wall stuff. Things like "I don't WANT to get out of time-out!" and "I don't WANT to stop cwying!" You have to picture this skinny little kid with a big scowl on his face and his arms crossed to really get the full picture. Also he still can't quite pronounce his R's and L's which just adds to the comedy of it....

I need some advice. C is perfectly capable of dressing himself, getting his coat on, getting his shoes on, putting toys away, etc. However, he is getting slower...and slower...and slower. Two mornings ago it took him no less than 35 minutes to go potty, get dressed, and get his shoes and coat on. This does not include time spent eating breakfast or even any tantrum time - that's just how long it took. I was with him the whole time, encouraging/reminding him and helping him along. Admittedly, this did include him changing his clothes once because he decided he wanted to wear a shirt similar to Y's shirt (of course he decided this after he got dressed). You ask the child to put on his coat...and he gets it off the hook. Then he starts doing something else. Then you ask him again to put on his coat, and he puts the hood on his head (the first step to getting his coat on). Then he does something else. Or he runs around, and it falls off. Then you ask him again...you get t...

OK, I am about to explode with excitement! I just started reading this book, The Introvert Advantage . It is soooo so so good! If you are an introvert, are married to an introvert, or have a child (foster or not) that is an introvert, you MUST READ THIS BOOK! You can download the ebook for $7.76 at Amazon. Or, you know, maybe check it out at the library for free? I was too excited to wait for the library so I just bought it. :) Only about 1 in 4 people is an introvert, and our culture values extroversion over introversion. The pressure on introverted people to conform to the world of extroversion is extraordinary. The author gave several examples of extroverted parents bringing their introverted children to her, thinking that something was wrong with them and requesting that they undergo therapy. I know many times in my own childhood where I was forced to try to be extroverted, and I remember instances where I ended up in tears because I just couldn't do it. All of my frien...

I think tonight is the first time C has said "I love you!" to me without me saying it first. It melts my little heart and almost made me cry. He can be so sweet sometimes. At court D did get an additional overnight visit, so this weekend he was gone for three nights! He came home tonight with a pretty bad attitude. I'm sure it's difficult to come back here after being with his mom for 3 days straight. Plus he is probably tired, I'm just guessing! M is walking. I had no idea, until I glanced at her as I was getting her breakfast ready this morning and she was taking a few very wobbly steps towards me with outstretched arms! Oh she is SO CUTE. I just love her so much! She slept for about an hour this morning, but I still got to hang out with her for an hour or so. Wish I could see her more but she is a busy girl these days with 3 overnight visits with her mom! I have less than 100 miles to run until I reach 1,000 miles for the year. I am excited! Oh also,...

I got the Christmas tree put up today, and the little boys helped me decorate it which was fun! They were so excited. The only bummer thing about doing something out of the ordinary like that is that it is very difficult for them to transition back to doing "normal" things - playing with their toys and such. So there were some rough moments and bed time was completely awful for one of the two of them (just guess which one! ;) ). But it was fun otherwise and the boys were so excited! Another bummer thing is that I don't have any Christmas lights so our tree is light-less. But it still looks nice. We'll see how long it will stay up without being damaged or knocked over or having decorations removed and played with. I figure the chances are better this year since our dog is no longer really a puppy, and now we have a 2 and 3 year old instead of a 1 and 2 year old. I asked D if he wanted to help decorate, and he politely declined. Though I think he secretly wanted ...