Good news/bad news
Ben has been putting himself to sleep for nap times! Can you believe it? If you would have told me a week ago that Ben would be napping on his own right now I would have laughed in your face and said no way! NO WAY!
Yesterday he took THREE naps on his own, the first two were an hour and 15 minutes and the last one was only 40 minutes, but hey beggars can't be choosers! I just nursed him, put him down in his bassinet awake, patted him a minute, then walked away. No crying, no fussing, and when I left he was awake. It's a miracle! I think it has really helped that he has apparently developed a great love for his middle and ring fingers, and sucks on them regularly. It looks like he's signing "I love you". :)
The bad news is, he has a cold so he's not really sleeping any better at night. Last night he was up 8 times between 8 p.m. and 7:30 a.m. this morning. I downloaded a sleep tracker ap on my phone so I can easily see when he was awake and not have to try to remember. :) I did give him his formula bottle before bed and it didn't seem to help. His longest stretch of sleep randomly comes in the middle of the night, last night it was about an hour and 40 minutes. Two nights ago, it was 2.5 hours! I felt so amazing after getting that much sleep. His shortest stretch last night was 30 minutes. Awesome right? Poor guy!
So anyway, baby steps. I am so thankful that he can sleep on his own at least some of the time, and so thankful that he is putting himself to sleep for naps. It makes a huge difference in my day when I can just get stuff done without having to worry if I'm waking him up!
Now for the bad news.
I think our home purchase might fall through. Here is all the junk we have faced (in no particular order):
First, our original lender was fighting with us thinking that we didn't make enough money. Turns out they were only using Brian's income and not mine. Why? Who knows!
Then our new lender found a bankruptcy in Brian's name from 2011. Except that we don't have any debt (other than our mortgage), and haven't had any for like 7 or 8 years. Then they figured out it was a different guy with Brian's name but not his SSN...wouldn't they check that before they let us know and stress us out even more?
Then, we had the home inspection and basically the roof needs to be replaced. The lender won't lend on it until the roof is replaced or patched and certified leak free. The current owner won't pay for anything, so basically we'd have to dump money into this house and we don't even have an ownership interest in it. Replacement will cost about $8,000. We have the cash, but wouldn't be able to do much else to the house basically (until our current home sells and we can get the equity out, which who knows when that will be) and the carpet is filthy and worn and stretched out and awful, and we also wanted to get the outside painted and caulked before winter comes. So now we have to figure out what to do and if we can afford it and what we can live with.
Then the current owner (a bank) has only one guy that can sign for stuff and apparently he is out of town until August 1.Of course no one bothered to tell us this until it was too late. We would have closed earlier if we had known! Actually we would have closed earlier if the bank hadn't taken forever to accept our offer, and maybe if our realtor would have followed up with them a little bit better we could already be closed. Sighner guy is in TX, so we'd have to sign stuff, overnight it to him, he'd have to overnight it back, blah blah blah. They want us to sign an agreement that we'll close by August 9. HELLO! We can not wait that long! Then we STILL wouldn't be able to move in until the stuff is done. Once again, school starts the 12th.
Meanwhile, mold is growing on the carpet in the basement from the humidity because they are leaving the A/C off, the people underwriting the loan are asking us all this stuff that nobody knows the answer to. And it is a huge stinking pain in the butt. Oh yeah and our realtor STINKS and never calls us back and is super lazy. If he would have persisted a little more I think we probably could have been closed by now. He takes a week to call us back and doesn't follow up with anyone. Brian is basically doing his job for him which is unfortunate.
All in all it has added up to be a perfect storm of incompetence and closing-delaying situations, and I'm just not sure we can go through with this now.
So I went through the MLS and FSBO listings today and found several homes that I like, sent them to Brian and we'll see. One in particular I really love. I don't mind not closing for a while if we can get a home that doesn't need any work. New carpet, new paint inside and outside, new roof....the cost of stuff like that adds up fast, and the fact that we are on a short timeline and our funds are limited because we don't borrow money (other than for the mortgage) and we can't get the equity out of our current home until it sells. It's soooo frustrating. Ugh.
So, we'll see. It seems like God is saying "DON'T BUY THIS HOUSE" but we are just now getting the memo. We shall just wait and see I guess. The next few days are going to make or break this deal.
Yesterday he took THREE naps on his own, the first two were an hour and 15 minutes and the last one was only 40 minutes, but hey beggars can't be choosers! I just nursed him, put him down in his bassinet awake, patted him a minute, then walked away. No crying, no fussing, and when I left he was awake. It's a miracle! I think it has really helped that he has apparently developed a great love for his middle and ring fingers, and sucks on them regularly. It looks like he's signing "I love you". :)
The bad news is, he has a cold so he's not really sleeping any better at night. Last night he was up 8 times between 8 p.m. and 7:30 a.m. this morning. I downloaded a sleep tracker ap on my phone so I can easily see when he was awake and not have to try to remember. :) I did give him his formula bottle before bed and it didn't seem to help. His longest stretch of sleep randomly comes in the middle of the night, last night it was about an hour and 40 minutes. Two nights ago, it was 2.5 hours! I felt so amazing after getting that much sleep. His shortest stretch last night was 30 minutes. Awesome right? Poor guy!
So anyway, baby steps. I am so thankful that he can sleep on his own at least some of the time, and so thankful that he is putting himself to sleep for naps. It makes a huge difference in my day when I can just get stuff done without having to worry if I'm waking him up!
Now for the bad news.
I think our home purchase might fall through. Here is all the junk we have faced (in no particular order):
First, our original lender was fighting with us thinking that we didn't make enough money. Turns out they were only using Brian's income and not mine. Why? Who knows!
Then our new lender found a bankruptcy in Brian's name from 2011. Except that we don't have any debt (other than our mortgage), and haven't had any for like 7 or 8 years. Then they figured out it was a different guy with Brian's name but not his SSN...wouldn't they check that before they let us know and stress us out even more?
Then, we had the home inspection and basically the roof needs to be replaced. The lender won't lend on it until the roof is replaced or patched and certified leak free. The current owner won't pay for anything, so basically we'd have to dump money into this house and we don't even have an ownership interest in it. Replacement will cost about $8,000. We have the cash, but wouldn't be able to do much else to the house basically (until our current home sells and we can get the equity out, which who knows when that will be) and the carpet is filthy and worn and stretched out and awful, and we also wanted to get the outside painted and caulked before winter comes. So now we have to figure out what to do and if we can afford it and what we can live with.
Then the current owner (a bank) has only one guy that can sign for stuff and apparently he is out of town until August 1.Of course no one bothered to tell us this until it was too late. We would have closed earlier if we had known! Actually we would have closed earlier if the bank hadn't taken forever to accept our offer, and maybe if our realtor would have followed up with them a little bit better we could already be closed. Sighner guy is in TX, so we'd have to sign stuff, overnight it to him, he'd have to overnight it back, blah blah blah. They want us to sign an agreement that we'll close by August 9. HELLO! We can not wait that long! Then we STILL wouldn't be able to move in until the stuff is done. Once again, school starts the 12th.
Meanwhile, mold is growing on the carpet in the basement from the humidity because they are leaving the A/C off, the people underwriting the loan are asking us all this stuff that nobody knows the answer to. And it is a huge stinking pain in the butt. Oh yeah and our realtor STINKS and never calls us back and is super lazy. If he would have persisted a little more I think we probably could have been closed by now. He takes a week to call us back and doesn't follow up with anyone. Brian is basically doing his job for him which is unfortunate.
All in all it has added up to be a perfect storm of incompetence and closing-delaying situations, and I'm just not sure we can go through with this now.
So I went through the MLS and FSBO listings today and found several homes that I like, sent them to Brian and we'll see. One in particular I really love. I don't mind not closing for a while if we can get a home that doesn't need any work. New carpet, new paint inside and outside, new roof....the cost of stuff like that adds up fast, and the fact that we are on a short timeline and our funds are limited because we don't borrow money (other than for the mortgage) and we can't get the equity out of our current home until it sells. It's soooo frustrating. Ugh.
So, we'll see. It seems like God is saying "DON'T BUY THIS HOUSE" but we are just now getting the memo. We shall just wait and see I guess. The next few days are going to make or break this deal.
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ReplyDeleteSorry to hear about the house so frustrating!! I do believe you end up where God wants you to be. I will keep your family in my prayers as you have big decisions to make:)
ReplyDeleteDoes Ben completely finish his bottles you offer of formula? If so, have you considered giving him a bottle that has 2-3 more ounces in it (a six ounce bottle instead of a four ounce bottle) to see how much he can handle at a feeding? Just a thought.
ReplyDeleteOh boy, I agree with the message you are getting about the house. ANY time in my life if I'm not suppose to do something I hit roadblock after roadblock after roadblock. Afterwards I look back and see the 2x4 that God was hitting me over the head with and all the dents in it, realizing what he saving me from by using it! ;) I don't want to name names, but our realtor was AMAZING and he sold the hnosko's their home, my brother his...if you want his info, let me know. I'm 99% sure it's not who you have!
ReplyDeleteRoger referred us to this guy.
ReplyDeleteI'm really concerned about the mold stuff. Could be more than meets the eye. And the roof thing puts you in a rough spot. Are you going to replace a roof on a house you don't own? That's really scary. Maybe the bank will hire someone to burn it down if you guys don't buy it.
ReplyDeletereally? Did you let Roger know how it went with him?
ReplyDelete