Christmas, bio mom, baptism, etc.

I know it has been a loooong long time since I updated. I could say a lot but I'll try to keep it short.  Maybe in the next few days I'll have some time to write some more (pardon me while I giggle at the prospect of having more time!).

Christmas was lovely. Our children unfortunately missed or had shortened or car naps four days in a row (count them, FOUR!) and at least one night of staying up until 10:30 p.m. talking amongst themselves (much to our chagrin!).  Zero days of sleeping in, of course. :)  Lots of family was seen, about 17 hours were spent driving, lots of fun was had, and many presents were opened.  Several tantrums occurred, though I have to say I think they did very well with the sleep situation being what it was. Many times they waited until we were home or in the car to melt down, which is always better than having to deal with a public tantrum!  Last night they were in bed by 6:30 p.m. and didn't wake up until almost 8 this morning. So yeah, they were tired!  I'm guessing we'll shoot for an early bed time again tonight just to make sure they have had enough sleep.

The kids' bio mom sent me a message on Facebook out of the blue yesterday.  If you recall from our contact agreement we had said that she could have a visit, supervised by us, with the kids around Christmas time as long as she initiated it.  It sounds like she is not doing well right now honestly, and I know she feels badly. At first she was saying she didn't feel like she ought to see the fact she even said that she doesn't even have pictures of them any longer because she can't handle it, apparently they are all at her friends' house or something. I tried to be encouraging for her, told her when she is ready if she gives me her address I can send her pictures, etc.  Then she was saying that she felt like the kids should control the contact so they don't hate her, or something like that.

Now we have had a few messages back and forth and she is asking me what I think about if she ought to do the visit.  I think she wants to see the kids, I think she feels like she is not in a good place to see them right now, and I think she also wants someone to tell her she is wrong.

I am not going to be that person!

So I told her that if I were her I'd trust my gut, and ask people (she mentioned a counselor and another close friend) that are familiar with her situation what they think.  Knowing what I know at this point based on what she has told me, I don't think now would be a good time to have a visit.  Sigh.

D said a week or so ago that he wants to get baptized. When we asked him why, he said "Because I believe in God now." We have had several different conversations with him about grace, forgiveness, being "good enough" to get into heaven, etc.  I feel like it has been explained to him pretty clearly at least a couple of times...but he can't articulate it. Which makes me think he doesn't understand it. So I sent an email to people at our church. I know there is a class you have to take before you get baptized, I'm hoping that it could finalize all of these things in his head so that we can make 100% sure he understands the choice he is making before just going through the  motions.

I know that the longer I live the more insight I have into the whole grace/forgiveness/etc. thing, and I know I'll never ever be able to understand it fully...maybe when I die, I guess, but definitely not on this earth.  I just want him to understand as much as he can, you know?

The next baptism celebration at our church is in February, so I guess we'll see what happens!

The plan to keep the kids home later in the mornings to help Miss M's behavior seems to be working! I've gotten a few sad notes home in the 3 weeks that we have been doing it, but mostly they are just notes where she had a meltdown over one thing and then was fine the rest of the day. No biting, yay!  So I am pretty happy about that!  I also think our evenings with her are easier, she is definitely having way fewer fits.

I am very tired.  It is hard work carrying around an extra 19 pounds. The baby has been moving around so much the last few days...too much Christmas candy, maybe. ;)   I'll be 26 weeks tomorrow. If I gain a pound a week from here on out I'll still be under the 35 pound max that they "like" you to gain. My weight gain has slowed down substantially lately, in fact I was even loosing weight for a while, so I'm hopeful I won't pack on more pounds than I need.  I am excited to meet my baby and get my body back, at least as much of it as I can!  My next appointment is January 3rd and I have to have a glucose screen...hopefully that goes OK, I really don't want to have gestational diabetes!

He is starting to kick me in places that are very uncomfortable, like my right rib cage. I don't know if there is an organ up there or just not very much padding but it is definitely painful!  Brian has been able to feel him kicking a couple of times, and I feel him a lot. Like especially when I'm trying to go to sleep at night. The other morning he woke me up at 6 and I never could go back to sleep because he was wiggling around so much. They say at about 32 weeks movement decreases because the baby runs out of room in there...we will see!  Even though it's obnoxious sometimes I still just can't help but smile. It is so amazing.

At church on Christmas Eve all the boys went to "big church" with us, while Miss M went to her normal classroom.  It was a pretty cool service. The boys did well. Some girls were dancing ballet on the stage for part of it, they were wearing beautiful white dresses, and Y asked me later that night if they were princesses. He was completely mesmerized and it was beautiful!

During the service they showed some video clips of Mary and Joseph and a little baby...little baby hands, little baby feet. I was choking up thinking about how my baby will get to be born (Lord willing) in a hospital with a trained physician, nurses, a surgical team available, a NICU, and any number of medical tools and professionals available for diagnosing and fixing any potential problems...and my Savior was born in a barn. I wonder if Joseph had to deliver the baby by himself, and how did he know what to do.  And how scary it must have been for him and for Mary too.

There now, I said this would be short and it is not!  And I'm crying so that means I'm done! :)  I hope you all had very merry Christmases!


  1. Try not to watch the scale too much ... big babies are wonderful! I had 10 and 9 pounders, and they have both always been exceedingly healthy! The weight comes off eventually. Enjoy this time with your changing body!

  2. You are one busy mama! Thanks for taking the time to write--I have enjoyed keeping up with your story. Joy to you all in the New Year!

  3. I'm so excited about D. It seems maybe the Lord is working in his heart. I'll pray that God would continue to open his eyes.


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